Steady yourselves, this is a complicated one. Loads of old people are having fun on a boat. Ancient and surly Otis (AKA the Commodore) looks on disapprovingly before boarding. It’s his party but he’s really not keen. His daughter Joanna is drunk and busty. Otis’ son-in-law Charles wants to expand his naval architecture business but he’s having none of it. Later Charles shows up at Otis’ house and he’s lying on the floor, dead. The only thing to do is dress as the Commodore and sail around ostentatiously before dumping the body at sea, then scuba diving off the boat and swimming back to land.
Columbo makes an appearance at 13 minutes and 35 seconds. The body has turned up and the lack of water in the lungs proves it wasn’t an accident.
Columbo snoops about and suspects Charles but then Charles goes and gets himself killed. Now we’re in the peculiar position of not knowing who the murderer is. This is extremely disorientating and made me feel a bit sleepy. Columbo gathers all the players together for an Agatha Christie style big reveal. The columboid is a watch. The murderer is Swanny. Who’s that you ask? Exactly.
We learn that Columbo knows nothing about boats and that his wife wants him to give up cigars. She thinks cigars are bad for her plants. She also talks to her plants.
During this episode I drank orange squash from a Lando Calrissian glass.